Heart vs. Head: No building walls tonight

Heart really really likes the idea of building some walls right now. Being vulnerable and loving hurts too much currently.

Head thinks that's a "stupid ass" decision, isolation does nothing to help.

Hannah is conflicted.

I'm in a few different types of emotional pain right now. Which is okay. But it sure feels like shit. 

1. Triflers. Why are boys so darn stupid? Triflers need not apply, if you do I will be disappointed in you, and that's worse than my anger. Clearly it's wonderful to be liked, but you really need to consider what that does to the other person. Another thing, I want to be loved, not toyed with. I have a lot of patience, I would be afraid to see myself snap at the unfortunate soul with a "flirty personality" who took the last straw.

2. Mom. It's a cycle. I am planning on getting off of this nightmarish carnival ride soon. Not sure what that looks like yet, but I'm seriously considering what moving out looks like.

3. Corona. Online school is hard. Not seeing people is hard. New lows are hard.

Tonight is worse than other nights. If tomorrow is not better, then next day will be, and if not then, the next. 

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